Don't Curse the Nurse!

Sharing support with stories & humor

Waa Waa Waa

on July 14, 2014

fay 3If you’re going to have a  pity party and my attendance is mandatory, you just have to acknowledge that that’s what it is, and I will comply because see, I have hosted a few myself. I will nod my head in affirmation, give a few “uh huh’s”, and make sure there are plenty of your favorite foods present. It’s your party and you shouldn’t be eating the crummy leftovers.

Go for the foods that trigger elevations in your serotonin level – a quick fix — I’d recommend a bacon cheeseburger on a whole wheat bun with a thin slice of avocado for flair. You got your carbohydrate, your protein, and your healthy fat in that juicy burger. Invite friends that have an appetite as healthy as yours, no real skinny people allowed.

There is natural OxyContin, the kind released from the brain when we are feeling loved, so… no solo pity partying is advised. Talk to a friend.You are also too vulnerable to be hitting the alcohol. Alcohol’s positive effects are so short — the nausea, headache, and valley of depression the next day aren’t worth it.

And finally,

When you hang the “Poor Me” balloons, hang them low. It helps to accentuate the absurdity of the event. I’d help you blow them up but I’ve been a little short of breath lately. Go with a black color scheme. When you wake up the next day and realize it’s not all that bad, the black will shame you into getting up even faster and getting on with the day.


9 responses to “Waa Waa Waa

  1. Victo Dolore says:

    OxyContin. (Snicker!) 😉

  2. My favourite contribution to a pity party is a sobby movie. Something like My Sister’s Keeper, Lorenzo’s oil or even, A Walk to Remember. Nothing better than crying at someone else dying to make yourself feel pitiful!!! 😀 Hope your week improves!

  3. Mary K says:

    I’ll bring the tiny violins.

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