Don't Curse the Nurse!

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Announcements, Announcements, Announcements, Annnnnnouncements!

on August 19, 2015
 Photo via www.acma.gov.au

We have this somewhat new thing at work where we have to announce the surgeons when they arrive in pre-op in the morning.

I get why we do it. There’s no value in the OR team standing around waiting for the doctor to show up and write “No” on the left knee and “Yes” on the right knee.

I’d just like the unit secretary to only take her breaks after my surgeons have arrived. When she’s gone, the responsibility falls on me and therein is the problem.

When I dial the overhead mic, I want to say something creative like “Attention staff members, Dr. So and so has arrived at Bay five and will shortly be departing for the locker room where he will don a set of faded scrubs that resemble lemon grass in the spring. Please have your patient positioned and ready to go when he enters the suite.”

I’ve also fantasized about being real hard core about it.

“Attention. Full alert. Dr. So and so is advancing toward the OR area. No one is to stand down until Time out is complete and the patient is under full anesthesia.”

Or I could rap it. “My doctor is here. Get your butt in gear. Patient’s ready to go, so…”

Or simply, “ It’s showtime!!!”

That would freak the patient out, so

With an effort to avoid sounding monotone, I will announce that _______________ is in preop. I will say it twice.

I can always buy a Karaoke mic set for Christmas and get this out of my system 🙂


14 responses to “Announcements, Announcements, Announcements, Annnnnnouncements!

  1. Victo Dolore says:

    Oh, how awkward! I would be tempted to get creative, too….

    • Susan says:

      Some day, when someone adds on a late surgery, when half the staff is gone and the patient in pre -op got some Dilaudid on the floor, I’m gonna do it!

  2. What a temptation. How much trouble would you get in if you succumbed?

  3. Ellen Hawley says:

    About writing No and Yes on the knees: When my partner had ankle surgery, the surgeon asked her to put an arrow on the ankle they were going to work on. I tried to convince her to add “This end up,” but she wouldn’t do it.

    Very sad tale

  4. DM says:

    Do it! You know you want to. 😉 I double dog dare you.

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