Don't Curse the Nurse!

Sharing support with stories & humor

Then there’s the priceless advice you get…

on July 7, 2016

july seventh

“You ever wonder why people lean left or right when they kiss.”


I gave the patient a sideways look then decided to relax. He was eighty-nine years old. This was most likely harmless.

“I’m talking about stand up kissing.”

Oh boy. Here we go.

I raised an eyebrow. He took my silence as an okay to continue.

“People that are right handed lean right. Lefties lean left.”

“Ah.” I hung his IV bag on the pole.

A coworker stepped in to put his monitors on and print a strip. He tried to pull her in.

“Where are you from? I got advice for you and your boyfriend.”

She tried to distract him. “Why don’t you guess where I’m from.”

He wasn’t buying it.

“Girls, you have to kiss someone who’s the same handed as you. It works when you stand opposite each other. Otherwise you bump noses. For stand-up kissing.”

My very married for like over twenty-five years coworker smiled with amusement, pasted the EKG strip down, waved good-bye, and moved on, leaving me the challenge of changing the direction of this conversation.

“So which are you?”

I looked up from the IV supplies I’d arranged on the bed by his arm.


“You lean right or left…” He looked at me with sincere seriousness … “for stand up kissing.”

If I heard “stand up kissing” one more time, I wasn’t going to be able to keep a straight face.

“I’m going to start your IV with my right hand.”

He started to speak again, but I interrupted.

“I understand. I need to date right-handed people. Now let’s talk about your home medicines.”


A different time, a different place, subtract thirty years from him — this would be a fun conversation.

9 responses to “Then there’s the priceless advice you get…

  1. DM says:

    Just never know quite what to expect from some of those old duffers. We had a neighbor (who was also about this age) who turned into quite an old pervert the last few years of his life…. Definitely helps to have a sense of humor in your line of work. DM

  2. K Burrowsfield says:

    I’m laughing too hard – great blog!



  3. Nurse Kelly says:

    Been there! Wonderful post! 🙂

  4. Fantastic post. Humorous, yet it made me think too much about whether I’d lean right or left in “stand up kissing”

  5. “I’m going to start your IV with my right hand.” – haha you killed it with that line 😅

    Good story as always.

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